October

Welcome, fall.  Even though as I write this today, it is sunny and 84 degrees here in Missouri.  Usually I am excited for October to arrive.  Halloween, orange and black decorations, beautiful fall colors surround me.  Usually I am excited for playoff baseball.  Not this year.
Last weekend started baseball playoffs.  I love it.  The Phillies have been hot, I mean they had the best record in baseball.  The last day of the season, the broke the franchise record and won 102 games.  They also knocked out the Braves from the playoffs.  Yet, they drew the short straw.  Their opponents in the first round...the St Louis Cardinals.  Ugh.  They got hot late, had great offense all season.  Yet, it shouldn't have been a match for the best pitching rotation in MLB right?  WRONG!  It was all wrong.  Living in Cardinal nation usually isn't a big deal.  But now that my team and their team were playing, it's all I freaking heard about.  People who don't normally stop in my office to say "hi", now stopping by to talk about baseball.  Seriously? 
J was already gearing up to lose the series.  His words "they are going to lose the first round of the playoffs and get knocked out by the Cards".  I didn't believe him, but then again I never do when it comes to sports.  He is more a pessimist, I on the other hand, am an optimist.  Always have been.  Believe they can pull it out at the end, as they have so many times before. 
Last night was game five of the series.  Winner moves on, loser starts their golf season earlier.  Phils main guy was pitching, Doc.  I mean he has been great all season, minus the first innings of games.  But, it's just the first inning right?  You still have 9 chances to come back.  And the game was at the Bank.  The 10th man would bring it.  He would be there.  He was one of the only ones to show up last night.
Everything was wrong, just wrong.  Doc had a typical first inning, the kind where he gives up runs early.  He gave up a triple with the lead off hitter.  Before you know it, they score.  The game is 1-0 Cardinals.  After that inning, Doc was himself.  Stellar, stopping any other Cardinals from crossing that plate.  Getting himself out of jams.  I thought, they have to come back right?  I mean, they are down by 1 run.  One swing of the bat can fix that.  I sat in my chair, hopeful, they wouldn't let me down.
I tried shifting, I tried waving my imaginary rally towel.  We even ate the same dinner we did when they won in game 3.  Another must win game.
By now, everyone knows how it ends.  The Phils did not come back.  Ryan Howard, ending the season like he did last...by not getting a hit.  On top of that, he tears his achillies tendon.  Great.
My hubby, I love him, but he gets a little crazy.  He is in a funk, and probably won't get out for a while.  I understand.  We all bleed Red in the summer, Green in the fall, Orange through the winter.  We are passionate.  We are all passionate.  Are we too passionate?  Some might say maybe.  Maybe we are crazy when we live this much through our sports.  We are up when they win, but when they break our hearts...man are we down.  Probably more down than the players themselves.  They put our emotions on a rollercoaster.  You think they know the ride they force us on? 
Last year when the Phils lost to the Giants in the NLCS...we cleaned and rearranged the living room furniture.  My husband just had to do something, anything.  I must say it looks really nice.  Last night, he was ready to move again.  So there we were at 12:30 am starting to rearrange our bedroom.  Something we haven't done since I moved out here 5 years ago (rearranged that is, not cleaned).  I wonder if cleaning and moving is a way we deal with all the emotions.  Clean our slate, get it out, wipe it down, so we can start all over again in April.  I must say though, I love the way we arranged our furniture.  It looks so nice.
While we finished after two am, I was up early today to go support the organization I volunteer for in the homecoming parade through town.  Today is Truman's homecoming.  The parade started at 9 am, but we had to check in and be there by 7:15.  I am tired.  And as I sit here, the sting of last nights game has not yet gone away.  Like I said I live in Card Nation, and I had about a half dozen people apologize to me during the parade today.  Really, you bring it up already?  Luckily I can let it go easily.  I mean being a fan of Philadelphia sports, you get used to say "well, there is always next year".  Maybe I, we, are not lucky enough to feel the high of more than one championship in our life time.  I mean, they did just win in 2008...what were we expecting anyway, a dynasty?  We aren't the Cardinals, or the Yankees.  Afterall, we are just Philly fans.
Luckily for me, the Eagles and the Flyers are in season now.  Time to bleed Green/Orange and give probably too much of my life riding this crazy rollercoaster of sport fandom.  For some strange reason, I wouldn't want it any other way.